I'm not sure if you read me or not. I'm not sure if these words will ever be read. I feel like I'm writing into an empty black hole, but I think I'm ok with that.
Since my last post, my life has been a roller coaster of good and bad. My mantra is that everything happens for a reason, and I firmly believe that. It's a constant reminder that there is some force in this world that brings people together - or apart. It's what brings people back into your life when another one leaves.
I've been able to step back and look at relationships in general with a different eye. To realize things that were blind before. There will be a lot that I will never understand, but I hope that one day I will find someone who will understand, who will be proud of what I am doing, and will be able to be there when I have a scare like I did in April. I am thankful for the friends that support me, and the new possibilities that have surfaced in May. April showers brought May flowers, and I can only hope that the summer will bring even more happiness.
I'm at a much better place in my life - in a place where I belong, away from depression and negativity that has surrounded my life for a while. I'm remembering who I am, and that I forgot for a while who that was. I was fun, exciting, spontaneous and social. I'm back to being that person, complete with a much better wardrobe. Or at least one that compels men to glance when I walk by, and offer to buy me drinks. A new phenomena that I have recently discovered, as before that I had been dubbed the 'hottest wife in the bar' and always been with my someone special. I like this newfound freedom.
On that note, I will conclude my note to you, black hole, or whoever you are reading this.
C
